I've decided to do Scripture studies for my blog every so often, and I don't want to commit to every week. I've just failed really bad at that. So I thought instead of setting a specific book to study, I'd play Scripture Roulette.
Basically, I will go to http://www.biblegateway.com/versions/English-Standard-Version-ESV-Bible/#books and pick a chapter with my eyes closed. Whichever one I hit, I will study in depth. I will always use the ESV, it's my favorite version because it seems the most poetic.
Hope you enjoy reading my thoughts!
~Lydia Joy~
Friday, August 24, 2012
Monday, August 20, 2012
He still believes in you...
It makes me sad to be an American sometimes. Most of the time this sorrow overwhelms me when I am caught between the rock and hard place of being a Christian with so many friends who are not. I have never been one to shove my beliefs onto others, but I feel that I have reached a point where I am not satisfied to never say anything about my faith and my Lord because it may make someone I love uncomfortable or offended. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 16:24: ~ 'Then Jesus told his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me."'
It is not easy for me to make stances of faith. In fact I think for many American Christians it is easier to hush up and never say anything, because, after all, Christ says in Matthew 5:38 '"You have heard that it was said, 'an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.' But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also."' In Romans 12:18, Paul tells us that as Christians 'If possible, so far as it depends on you live peaceably with all.'
So, we know the scriptures. Luke 4 tells us that the enemy does to. [Can I interject to say calling the enemy Satan or the Devil makes me a bit uncomfortable? I think that referring to him to him by his name makes the battle real, so from hence forth I will refer to him as one of these...] In Luke 4, Satan meets Christ during a 40 day fast in the desert. He quotes scripture to Jesus in the hopes of causing the Lord to stumble and sin, which of course would take away Christ's blamelessness, making him a less then perfect Sin Offering.
What's my point? Satan knows scriptures. He knows we are commanded to turn the other cheek. He knows we are to live peaceably with others. And the same serpent who had the audacity to turn the Word of God against the Son of God would be more than happy to turn it against the followers of Christ. He, after all, hates us. We are the reason he and his are damned to hell.
Here is the crux of the matter, here is my point.
First and foremost, I believe in Jesus. I believe that, as John 1:1 states, 'In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.'. I believe that the bible is the Word, and as a part of God, it is Holy and it is truth. The words of the bible apply to my life on a daily basis.I believe that it will never be out dated or old fashioned.
Secondly. I am a sinner. If my sins were held against me, the list would be long and damning. But I believe that when Christ died for my sins and rose from the dead, his blood was stamped over every one of my sins, marking them paid in full.
Third. This is hard to say. Romans 6:23 says 'For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.' Jesus says in John 14:6 'I am the way, the truth, and the life. No man comes to the Father except through me.' In Revelations 20:15 it says without a doubt '
You may ask why God would do such a thing. I hear people say "I can't imagine a loving God would do X, Y, or Z." One of the most common ones is "If God was a loving God, why would he damn people to hell?" Here's my answer. He is a loving God. He is also a perfect God, and a just God. He cannot dwell with imperfections. In his flawless justice he must condemn sin, he must purge the imperfections.
This is where His love steps in. Instead of writing us off, not only did He send his son to die for our sins, and freely give us access to Him, freely offer redemption, Psalms 66:10 says 'For you, oh God, have tested us; you have tried us as silver.' When silver is tried, it is purified. It is made beautiful and flawless. It is tried within fire, and all impurities are burned away. In His perfect love, God purifies us.
It is so easy to accept! I recently described it this way to a friend: Could Jesus have been the son of God? If your answer is yes, and John 1:1 says 'the Word was with God and the Word was God' and in verse 14: 'And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only son form the Father, full of grace and truth.'. So if Jesus was the Word, vs. 1 says 'the Word was God.' If Jesus was therefore God, does God not have the power to raise himself from the dead? Romans 10:9 says 'because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.'
All it takes to escape an eternity of separation from God is confessing that we are not enough, and confessing that Jesus Christ is. I will not deny my Lord. He gifted me Salvation, and I will honor Him in thought, word, and deed. I'm sorry if this makes you feel uneasy, but maybe that uneasiness is based on a subconscious (or even fully conscious) realization that this is truth.
It is not easy for me to make stances of faith. In fact I think for many American Christians it is easier to hush up and never say anything, because, after all, Christ says in Matthew 5:38 '"You have heard that it was said, 'an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.' But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also."' In Romans 12:18, Paul tells us that as Christians 'If possible, so far as it depends on you live peaceably with all.'So, we know the scriptures. Luke 4 tells us that the enemy does to. [Can I interject to say calling the enemy Satan or the Devil makes me a bit uncomfortable? I think that referring to him to him by his name makes the battle real, so from hence forth I will refer to him as one of these...] In Luke 4, Satan meets Christ during a 40 day fast in the desert. He quotes scripture to Jesus in the hopes of causing the Lord to stumble and sin, which of course would take away Christ's blamelessness, making him a less then perfect Sin Offering.
What's my point? Satan knows scriptures. He knows we are commanded to turn the other cheek. He knows we are to live peaceably with others. And the same serpent who had the audacity to turn the Word of God against the Son of God would be more than happy to turn it against the followers of Christ. He, after all, hates us. We are the reason he and his are damned to hell.
Here is the crux of the matter, here is my point.
First and foremost, I believe in Jesus. I believe that, as John 1:1 states, 'In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.'. I believe that the bible is the Word, and as a part of God, it is Holy and it is truth. The words of the bible apply to my life on a daily basis.I believe that it will never be out dated or old fashioned.
Secondly. I am a sinner. If my sins were held against me, the list would be long and damning. But I believe that when Christ died for my sins and rose from the dead, his blood was stamped over every one of my sins, marking them paid in full.
Third. This is hard to say. Romans 6:23 says 'For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.' Jesus says in John 14:6 'I am the way, the truth, and the life. No man comes to the Father except through me.' In Revelations 20:15 it says without a doubt '
You may ask why God would do such a thing. I hear people say "I can't imagine a loving God would do X, Y, or Z." One of the most common ones is "If God was a loving God, why would he damn people to hell?" Here's my answer. He is a loving God. He is also a perfect God, and a just God. He cannot dwell with imperfections. In his flawless justice he must condemn sin, he must purge the imperfections.
It is so easy to accept! I recently described it this way to a friend: Could Jesus have been the son of God? If your answer is yes, and John 1:1 says 'the Word was with God and the Word was God' and in verse 14: 'And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only son form the Father, full of grace and truth.'. So if Jesus was the Word, vs. 1 says 'the Word was God.' If Jesus was therefore God, does God not have the power to raise himself from the dead? Romans 10:9 says 'because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.'
All it takes to escape an eternity of separation from God is confessing that we are not enough, and confessing that Jesus Christ is. I will not deny my Lord. He gifted me Salvation, and I will honor Him in thought, word, and deed. I'm sorry if this makes you feel uneasy, but maybe that uneasiness is based on a subconscious (or even fully conscious) realization that this is truth.
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
On the Topic of Chick-fil-A
I have had a friend in the gay community block me of FaceBook and call me a bigot because of the fact that I like Chick-fil-A. I don't really want to be political at all in my life, but apparently I have offended people so I am going to talk about this situation.
#1) My sister Julia is married to a wonderful lady, Sally Jackson. If we have a boy, we're naming him Jax Abraham after my sister-in-law and his father. I have many dear friends as well as quite a few relatives who are attracted to and/or are in committed relationships with people of their own gender. I love these people dearly and as far as I know have never discriminated against them or treated them any differently than family or friends who are hetrosexual.
#2) I like Chick-fil-A. I like their food. I like the fact that they are a Christian based organization. I like that when I go to their restaurants, I am always greeted warmly and treated better than any other fast food company I've been to, heck... better than even expensive restaurants that I have been to. They are a company that closes on Sunday to honor the Sabbath. I support that 100%. I haven't even heard the CEO's comment that was apparently anti-GLTB, but I must ask, no matter what it was, does it *really* shock you that a man who is not only a conservative Christian from the Southern States (fondly known as the Bible Belt) who is over 80 years old would say that (from what I understand) he believes in the traditional definition of marriage?
#3) I am registered at Target (another supposedly anti-GLTB organization) for my baby shower. I also shop at JC Penny, would shop at Macy's if Omaha had one, and I eat Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream. These 3 companies are for the GLTB community. I purchase their products because I like what they sell.
#4) I will not be bullied into not liking something because people I know would be hurt by my support of it. I'm sorry, but if Chick-fil-A's stance offends you to the point of not going there, DON'T GO THERE. Don't try to force and coerce and guilt-trip people you love into not going someplace they would normally go and have liked for years because that's what you believe is right. I am a Christian and I don't cram my beliefs and ideals down others throats, and I expect the same courtesy in return.
#5) I think this whole topic is overblown. I think that the "famous" Christians in America and even the non-famous ones who take pictures of themselves eating and or drinking Chick-fil-A products is rather immature. But they have the right to speak their mind and the right to share pictures in public forums of them doing so. Eating food from a restaurant where the CEO has made a stance based on his morals and beliefs does not violate anyone else's rights.
That is all. If this offends you, please feel free to comment or whatever you feel necessary. I am not a bigot, and I am tired of having myself and fellow Christians being trampled on because we believe in following Christ's instruction to "turn the other cheek". If you feel my stance (as a Christian) is unacceptable and chose like my (now former) friend to block me and tell me "have a nice life", consider your own actions and ask yourself who is *really* being bigoted?
#1) My sister Julia is married to a wonderful lady, Sally Jackson. If we have a boy, we're naming him Jax Abraham after my sister-in-law and his father. I have many dear friends as well as quite a few relatives who are attracted to and/or are in committed relationships with people of their own gender. I love these people dearly and as far as I know have never discriminated against them or treated them any differently than family or friends who are hetrosexual.
#2) I like Chick-fil-A. I like their food. I like the fact that they are a Christian based organization. I like that when I go to their restaurants, I am always greeted warmly and treated better than any other fast food company I've been to, heck... better than even expensive restaurants that I have been to. They are a company that closes on Sunday to honor the Sabbath. I support that 100%. I haven't even heard the CEO's comment that was apparently anti-GLTB, but I must ask, no matter what it was, does it *really* shock you that a man who is not only a conservative Christian from the Southern States (fondly known as the Bible Belt) who is over 80 years old would say that (from what I understand) he believes in the traditional definition of marriage?
#3) I am registered at Target (another supposedly anti-GLTB organization) for my baby shower. I also shop at JC Penny, would shop at Macy's if Omaha had one, and I eat Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream. These 3 companies are for the GLTB community. I purchase their products because I like what they sell.
#4) I will not be bullied into not liking something because people I know would be hurt by my support of it. I'm sorry, but if Chick-fil-A's stance offends you to the point of not going there, DON'T GO THERE. Don't try to force and coerce and guilt-trip people you love into not going someplace they would normally go and have liked for years because that's what you believe is right. I am a Christian and I don't cram my beliefs and ideals down others throats, and I expect the same courtesy in return.
#5) I think this whole topic is overblown. I think that the "famous" Christians in America and even the non-famous ones who take pictures of themselves eating and or drinking Chick-fil-A products is rather immature. But they have the right to speak their mind and the right to share pictures in public forums of them doing so. Eating food from a restaurant where the CEO has made a stance based on his morals and beliefs does not violate anyone else's rights.
That is all. If this offends you, please feel free to comment or whatever you feel necessary. I am not a bigot, and I am tired of having myself and fellow Christians being trampled on because we believe in following Christ's instruction to "turn the other cheek". If you feel my stance (as a Christian) is unacceptable and chose like my (now former) friend to block me and tell me "have a nice life", consider your own actions and ask yourself who is *really* being bigoted?
A note on Chivalry.
A forewarning... I am not sure when I wrote this, but I have an idea... the partner I refer to is not my husband, but I still find this applicable to life (even mine, though my husband does bring home chocolates and flowers!), so I am sharing it. Please take it with a grain of salt, as it was a young me who was the author of this piece. I have tweaked it, pre-posting, because I felt there were ways to make it flow a bit easier.
Often I wonder about the idea of love. What is it exactly that makes women swoon at the idea of being romanced? I am a woman who finds myself in a place where I don’t need gifts to prove to me that I am loved. The idea of flowers and chocolates seems so cliché.
So why is it that the idea of receiving such tokens is appealing?
As I ponder the worth of such gifts, I am forced to realize. Simply because it may not have monetary value, such offerings are not worthless. They are the beginnings of memories. A rose given to a woman might be pressed into a book, and years down the line, discovered by her children or grandchildren. Suddenly, it is part of a legacy.
I find myself caught up in the idea that perhaps it is more than just a simple gesture. What if it is a reflection of something thought to be long dead? What if, in fact, it is chivalry in its purest form? After the feminist movement, women began to shun men for being gentleman. While I am most grateful to the women who fought to give my generation a voice, I almost feel that more harm was done than not.
No longer do men see us as treasures. We are independent, and strong. So often, we are not taken care of. I myself have laid awake at night, hoping that perhaps the man I am seeing would show up at my door simply because he missed me. On days such as Valentine’s where corporations push the idea of love onto consumers, I have found myself glancing at the doors of my work all day. Why? Because I hope that at any moment, those doors will open and I will be showered with gifts to show I am adored.
When such wishes are not fulfilled I am flooded with disappointment. How dare he not know what I have not told him? Of course I want flowers! I am, after all, a woman. But what good is it to rage inwardly, and later give a cold shoulder to a rather confused partner? Women no longer voice that we want those small things that make us feel like we are his world. Where does the fault lie? We cannot blame men for being ignorant of our desires.
I find myself humored at how little I myself know of the male species. So knowing that men are a mystery to women only leaves room to assume vice versa is also true. Women must assume that men do not know our inner thoughts and desires. It is time to voice the idea. Perhaps chivalry is not dead. True, it is an idea that had long been doormat, but with a little bit of effort, I believe it can be revived.
Please do not think I lay all the responsibility on men. Women have an equal share in the current status of chivalry. It is time for women to show to the men that they love that such gestures are greatly appreciated. It is time to reveal that in fact we do believe that such tokens of affection mean the world to us. We want romanced, but we need to show our men that it is, in fact, worth the effort.
Often I wonder about the idea of love. What is it exactly that makes women swoon at the idea of being romanced? I am a woman who finds myself in a place where I don’t need gifts to prove to me that I am loved. The idea of flowers and chocolates seems so cliché.
So why is it that the idea of receiving such tokens is appealing?
As I ponder the worth of such gifts, I am forced to realize. Simply because it may not have monetary value, such offerings are not worthless. They are the beginnings of memories. A rose given to a woman might be pressed into a book, and years down the line, discovered by her children or grandchildren. Suddenly, it is part of a legacy.I find myself caught up in the idea that perhaps it is more than just a simple gesture. What if it is a reflection of something thought to be long dead? What if, in fact, it is chivalry in its purest form? After the feminist movement, women began to shun men for being gentleman. While I am most grateful to the women who fought to give my generation a voice, I almost feel that more harm was done than not.
No longer do men see us as treasures. We are independent, and strong. So often, we are not taken care of. I myself have laid awake at night, hoping that perhaps the man I am seeing would show up at my door simply because he missed me. On days such as Valentine’s where corporations push the idea of love onto consumers, I have found myself glancing at the doors of my work all day. Why? Because I hope that at any moment, those doors will open and I will be showered with gifts to show I am adored.When such wishes are not fulfilled I am flooded with disappointment. How dare he not know what I have not told him? Of course I want flowers! I am, after all, a woman. But what good is it to rage inwardly, and later give a cold shoulder to a rather confused partner? Women no longer voice that we want those small things that make us feel like we are his world. Where does the fault lie? We cannot blame men for being ignorant of our desires.
I find myself humored at how little I myself know of the male species. So knowing that men are a mystery to women only leaves room to assume vice versa is also true. Women must assume that men do not know our inner thoughts and desires. It is time to voice the idea. Perhaps chivalry is not dead. True, it is an idea that had long been doormat, but with a little bit of effort, I believe it can be revived.
Please do not think I lay all the responsibility on men. Women have an equal share in the current status of chivalry. It is time for women to show to the men that they love that such gestures are greatly appreciated. It is time to reveal that in fact we do believe that such tokens of affection mean the world to us. We want romanced, but we need to show our men that it is, in fact, worth the effort.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
3rd time's a Charm?
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| Embryo at 7 Weeks Gestation |
Is this not the most beautiful image you have ever seen? Okay, maybe not, but I think that's only because you aren't standing in my shoes.
On 23 April 2012, we lost our second pregnancy.
I asked them to run blood work on me at the doctors office because (in my words) "I didn't feel like waiting around for a 3rd miscarriage to learn there was something wrong with me."
As it turns out, there was.
Methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase (MTHFR) is a gene which everybody has. It commonly mutates, and in women the mutation causes a lack of folic acid, which the baby needs to grow. That was not my only issue however. I had a second problem. Apparently my blood has a clotting issue which causes blood clots to form in my uterine lining, which blocks off the placenta. Essentially, my body was stopping my babies from developing. They told me they hoped they could help with both problems, and the fix was easy. I was to continue on a prenatal as well as take 3 extra folic acid supplements and 1 baby aspirin a day, taking care of both my deficiency and my clotting issue (aspirin is a blood thinner). I implemented this change into my life immediately.
Methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase (MTHFR) is a gene which everybody has. It commonly mutates, and in women the mutation causes a lack of folic acid, which the baby needs to grow. That was not my only issue however. I had a second problem. Apparently my blood has a clotting issue which causes blood clots to form in my uterine lining, which blocks off the placenta. Essentially, my body was stopping my babies from developing. They told me they hoped they could help with both problems, and the fix was easy. I was to continue on a prenatal as well as take 3 extra folic acid supplements and 1 baby aspirin a day, taking care of both my deficiency and my clotting issue (aspirin is a blood thinner). I implemented this change into my life immediately.
One month later, I had been constantly making mad dashes to the lady's room all week. Several times I asked myself 'why do I have to pee so much?' and then shrugged it off. There was no way we could be pregnant. We'd been trying not to. We hadn't "done the deed" in the 3 weeks after our chemical pregnancy, which more than enveloped my predicted ovulation date. During this week of constant bathroom breaks I took a home test for the heck of it. Negative. Duh. And then 2 days later, I was in bed and rolled over. My arm barely brushed my chest and the pain was too much to bear. I was grumpy, but fell asleep without giving it a second thought. I took another test the next morning thinking 'there is no way this will be a positive.'
The first test lied. Which I yelled as I charged upstairs from the main bathroom. I chucked the test at my husband who was just finishing his business in the upstairs bathroom. He barely got out an awkward "Congratulations?" as I threw myself into his arms, sobbing and repeating more than once "I don't want to be pregnant!!"
The doctor's office had told me to notify them immediately if I got pregnant again (after the 3 months we were supposed to wait) so I went in that morning. My hcg was 17, my progesterone was normal. I was pregnant.
I am now further along than I have ever been, 7 and a half weeks. My last blood draw about a week ago, my hcg was at 9153. I am terrified, but so very excited. My baby is growing. I'm exhausted, sleeping in almost every day. Nausea has been plaguing me for 4 days straight. My bladder is always full. I'm not cramping. I haven't spotted once.
I am praying that this sweet baby makes full term, and I can't wait to see this special child that will be a combination of my husband and I. We have our names picked out, Jax Abraham for a boy and Madelyn Lorraine for a girl. I can't wait to find out which of the two it will be.
That is why I think this photograph is so beautiful. At 7 weeks pregnant, my baby probably looks very similar to that image. At 7 weeks pregnant, all of my hopes and dreams are resting in a child that is as small as a blueberry. But most of all, at 7 weeks pregnant, I am blessed beyond measure.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
♥ Honor Noël Serafino ♥
How can this have happened again? I feel betrayed. I was trusting God. I prayed for this baby! And yet, now we have another tag to buy for my husband's necklace. 23 April 2012. Our second baby's born to Heaven date.
I suppose I should find comfort that Miracle now has a little brother in Heaven with her (strange that just as we feel in our hearts that Miracle would have been a little girl, our hearts are telling us that this one would have been a boy...). I suppose I should be grateful that we now have been pregnant, not once, but twice... proving I am definitely not infertile. I suppose I should thank the Lord for the amazing man who lends me his shoulder to cry on and holds me through my pain. but I can't do any of these things.
It's so unreal. 17 April 2012, we had the first of 4 positive pregnancy tests. I had every early pregnancy symptom in the book... every symptom I had had with Miracle. And this time... there was no cramping... slight pokes, but that just felt like ligament stretching... my heart was sure... this baby would stick. Come 21 December 2012 (Okay, I was really hoping for the 25th, a little Christmas bundle...) I was certain we'd be holding our little boy in our arms.
I went into get my blood work done on the 23rd. About an hour later the cramps hit, and I started to bleed. It was getting heavy by the time that I got a call from the doctor... I was 2.6 HgC... not pregnant. It took a bit to convince the nurse that I had been pregnant... She said that it seemed impossible for my quants to drop that fast (most pregnancy tests are sensitive at 25mL of HgC and it had only been 3 days since my last positive...). I explained that with Miracle, my quants went from 2400mL at a (supposedly) normal check up on 10 February 2012 to a mere 100mL by the time I was in the ER miscarrying on 14 February 2012. Within a few hours of the call, I passed the exact same tissue I'd passed at the ER when we lost Miracle.
They decided it was a "chemical pregnancy". Which means as far as they're concerned... it's just a late period. Like I wasn't investing in this baby since we found out about him. As though he never was, even though the baby "starts", and just stops its development before implantation. What makes it worse for me is that I was holding off on being excited. I wasn't as connected to Honor as I was to Miracle. That makes me feel like a bad person... even though I know I loved my little Orange Seed baby more than anything. And I'm fighting my rationality so that I can grieve the loss of this precious baby.
It seems so unfair. In my head, I hear the lie of the enemy, the words of Job's wife, mocking me... "Come on Lydia... He is stealing your dreams... don't be a fool... you have nothing left... curse God, and die!"
But resonating in my heart, born up on the butterfly-Angel wings of my two precious babies is the response from Job, an arrow strait to the heart of the enemy: "The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away. BLESSED BE THE NAME OF THE LORD."
Honor Noël, my precious child. I love you, and my heart is full of joy that you were born into the arms of your Heavenly Father. I know that you are safe in the arms of Jesus. Give your sister hugs and kisses from me. Be good to your Nana and Great-Grandpa, and tell them that I love them... Tell them that we'll be there soon... so save a place for Daddy and I. I give you ALL the love in my Heart --Mommy
It's so unreal. 17 April 2012, we had the first of 4 positive pregnancy tests. I had every early pregnancy symptom in the book... every symptom I had had with Miracle. And this time... there was no cramping... slight pokes, but that just felt like ligament stretching... my heart was sure... this baby would stick. Come 21 December 2012 (Okay, I was really hoping for the 25th, a little Christmas bundle...) I was certain we'd be holding our little boy in our arms.
I went into get my blood work done on the 23rd. About an hour later the cramps hit, and I started to bleed. It was getting heavy by the time that I got a call from the doctor... I was 2.6 HgC... not pregnant. It took a bit to convince the nurse that I had been pregnant... She said that it seemed impossible for my quants to drop that fast (most pregnancy tests are sensitive at 25mL of HgC and it had only been 3 days since my last positive...). I explained that with Miracle, my quants went from 2400mL at a (supposedly) normal check up on 10 February 2012 to a mere 100mL by the time I was in the ER miscarrying on 14 February 2012. Within a few hours of the call, I passed the exact same tissue I'd passed at the ER when we lost Miracle.
They decided it was a "chemical pregnancy". Which means as far as they're concerned... it's just a late period. Like I wasn't investing in this baby since we found out about him. As though he never was, even though the baby "starts", and just stops its development before implantation. What makes it worse for me is that I was holding off on being excited. I wasn't as connected to Honor as I was to Miracle. That makes me feel like a bad person... even though I know I loved my little Orange Seed baby more than anything. And I'm fighting my rationality so that I can grieve the loss of this precious baby.
It seems so unfair. In my head, I hear the lie of the enemy, the words of Job's wife, mocking me... "Come on Lydia... He is stealing your dreams... don't be a fool... you have nothing left... curse God, and die!"
But resonating in my heart, born up on the butterfly-Angel wings of my two precious babies is the response from Job, an arrow strait to the heart of the enemy: "The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away. BLESSED BE THE NAME OF THE LORD."
Honor Noël, my precious child. I love you, and my heart is full of joy that you were born into the arms of your Heavenly Father. I know that you are safe in the arms of Jesus. Give your sister hugs and kisses from me. Be good to your Nana and Great-Grandpa, and tell them that I love them... Tell them that we'll be there soon... so save a place for Daddy and I. I give you ALL the love in my Heart --Mommy
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Monday, April 9, 2012
Woman of Courage: Ruth; Chapter 1, Verses 1-5
Ruth 1:1-5 - ESV
Verse 1: ...and a man of Bethleham in Judah went to sojourn in the country of Moab, he and his wife and his two sons.
Verse 2: ...They went into the country of Moab and remained there.
Sojourn as listed below, means a brief travel, so what on earth was so attractive to them that they would 'remain there'? The scriptures do not say, but one can assume that there was a draw to the earthly aspects that this family found in this pagan country.
Definintion: brief travel; visit
Synonyms: layoveer, residence, rest, stay, stop, stopover, tarriance, vacation
Verse 1: ...and a man of Bethleham in Judah went to sojourn in the country of Moab, he and his wife and his two sons.
Verse 2: ...They went into the country of Moab and remained there.Sojourn as listed below, means a brief travel, so what on earth was so attractive to them that they would 'remain there'? The scriptures do not say, but one can assume that there was a draw to the earthly aspects that this family found in this pagan country.
Main Entry: sojourn [n. soh-jurn; v. soh-jurn, soh-jurn]
Part of Speech: nounDefinintion: brief travel; visit
Synonyms: layoveer, residence, rest, stay, stop, stopover, tarriance, vacation
Verse 3: But Elimelech, the husband of Naomi, died, and she was left with her two sons...
Verse 4: These took Moabite wifes... they lived there about ten years...
Verse 5: And both Mahlon and Chilion died, so that the woman was left without her two sons and husband.
How horrific! A couple weeks ago, my husband was at a music recital for his siblings, and I was supposed to meet him there. We'd been having starter problems with our jeep, and after getting off work about half an hour after the Recital started, I found that the car wouldn't start no matter what I did. Eventually, a kind stranger helped by climbing under the car and banging on our old starter, but in the moment, I was panicked! After not being able to reach my husband, it hit me that I was alone in this crisis! I had to find out how to solve the problem on my own.
I wonder if that is how Naomi felt. She and her husband had decided to go on a trip until the famine in their home country was over. Together, they could do anything! So, she agrees. They reach Moab and life is good. So her husband decides that their family should stay put. What a hard pill to swallow. I imagine she thought something along the lines of 'Okay, life without my family, my mom, my friends? Well... we're together, so we can get through anything!'
And then her world shatters. Her husband is gone. Not only is she in a foreign country alone, but she's in a foreign country alone with her two boys. The scripture doesn't say how old they were only that they married and lived there 10 years, so I'm imagining that they're little boys... say 11 and 9. Old enough that within that time frame they could marry, and yet young enough for it to be a daunting task for a widow to carry on alone.
My link to BibleStudyTools.com finds in the definition of a widow: Weeping, mourning, and desolation describe her personal experience after the loss of her spouse. Poverty, and indebtedness were all too often descriptive of her financial situation, when the main source of her economic support, her husband, had perished. Indeed, she was frequently placed alongside the orphan and the landless immigrant as a representative of the poorest of the poor.
So here is Naomi, a widowed immigrant caring for two half-orphaned sons. Very much so the "poorest of the poorest of the poor". And then her sons grow up. They find wives. No doubt these women came with dowries, so perhaps the sons had enough to truly care for their mother for the first time in their lives. Until they too, like their father die.
I can imagine the budding hope in Naomi's heart, and I can here the thud of her heart dropping when not one, but both, of her sons die. All she has left of the family she loves are two girls from the country that brought the death of all three of her men.
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
To clean, or not to clean... that is the question.
"Who can find a capable wife? She is far more precious than jewels...
She draws on her strength, and reveals that her arms are strong...
She watches over the activities of her household, and is never idle."
Proverbs 31:10, 17, & 27
Well, if you are anything like me, your heart sank just a little bit at my comparison to the "Proverbs 31" woman... I know without a doubt... I will *never* measure up to her... I mean, who could? She is the essence of perfection... which is something that I am *not*. I remember when my husband and I were dating, or maybe even before, he said he wanted a wife who was a "Proverbs 31" woman... I could have so easily said "get real buddy! That just isn't going to happen!" Instead, I wrote a prayer journal.
For each of the verses I wrote a prayer for his future wife. I lived in Texas for several months and a friend there (who was also our Bible Study leader) told our study group [my paraphrase]: "if you like somebody, pray for their future spouse. If you know what they're looking for in a spouse, pray specifically for that. No matter the out come, God will bless your friend with the spouse they desire. If you are that spouse, maybe God will work on things that need to be worked on in your life to make you the person that they desire."
Well I am not this illusive woman, as I have already stated. So I came up with prayers that made it possible for God to build these traits in me. I'm over 5 months into marriage, and still can't see that work begun in me. It's so frustrating!
I want to keep a clean house! I remember when we were thinking about where to live, Abraham told me that he thought we should get a house because it'd be more "fun" for me to set up our first home in a real house. We got a 1 bed, 1 bath. The house is adorable: a small kitchen, dining nook, bedroom, living room, sun room, enclosed porch, basement, bathroom, and laundry room. It seriously could be a dollhouse, if only I had the gumption to keep it clean! I feel like such a failure. I am working part time which for the most part, plays out to (2) 5 hour shifts a week, sometimes 3. And my little house is a wreck.
I don't get it. Both my mom and my Grandmother had huge homes. And those women did their darnedest to keep their homes neat and tidy. I have the work ethic, and the elbow grease... I worked part time at Arby's once... I failed with the food service, but boy oh boy did I bring a sparkle to the kitchen... They had planned on letting me go, but when I asked to stay on one day a week and clean, they were more than happy to do so. One time, I took a small hand scrubber and scrubbed the grease drippings outside. It went from looking like a bed of black tar to fresh laid cement. I know I can clean!
You might say "oh, well obviously you want to be out in the work force..." I'd have to say that that would be a true statement to a certain degree. However, all my life when asked what I wanted to do when I grew up I would only know for sure that I was supposed to be a wife and a mother. Any and all other careers bounced around in my head and then right back out of it. So how does my desire meet reality?
I want and crave a clean environment, but have no clue where to start! Please, I would love to hear ideas! I've got nothing and 3 days left until I work again.
Monday, March 26, 2012
Regarding Purity
To my dear Sisters in Christ:
I am going to expose my past, in the hope of teaching, and of helping any of you dealing with pains from your pasts. I have a past that is full of disgusting muck that I could have easily avoided, and perhaps I can show a younger generation to avoid future hurts.
When I was 13, my Christian parents honored my commitment to wait until marriage to have sex with a beautiful, diamond “promise” ring, or purity ring if that is how you describe them. When I broke that promise at the age of 19, I broke a promise not only to myself and to God, but to the parents who trusted me enough to invest a good sum of money into a visible declaration of my intent to live purely until I was bound, before God, to a husband.
The first of a long string of partners was a man I didn't really know. He was 20, and dating a girl who was 16. I didn't know about her until after we had slept together, but I had met her once (and kissed him in front of her)... and later found out that not only did she obviously know about me, but she knew about the other girls he had and was sleeping with. My first boyfriend (and second partner) I cheated on the night after we first slept together with a man that I met at a bar. My “first love” was separated from his son's mother, but continued to sleep with her while dating and sleeping with me. I have had a total of 4 boyfriends. To my shame, I have slept with around 12 people. Even worse, not only were not all of my partners were men, but the women I slept with were all either in serious relationships, engaged, and in one case, married. I loathe that part of my past.
In short, when I started dating my husband, I was pretty used up and facing heavy Spiritual opposition.
We only dated for a couple months, at the end of which my husband proposed. By that point we had a far from perfect relationship, in which we both had failed the other immensely, however, we had both put mile long lists of fleeces before God which had all been checked off in very obvious manners, so I said “yes”. We were married last October.
I feel robbed of the 6 months to a year that we could have had dating and getting to know each other and just having fun... pure and simple. There are a lot of bumps in the road that should have been avoided. We fight, not physically but verbally, more than newly-weds should. When we lost our first pregnancy in February, while it didn't pull us apart, I found it hard to draw close to a man who is still earning my trust... a trust that should have been made complete when we pledged our vows to God before witnesses of family and friends. We are blessed that there is an underlay of knowing we should be fighting for each other, because to my shame I have already threatened and nearly carried out separation with the intent of divorce. And yet, my husband is my best friend.
You might be feeling like this is not an encouragement to you. Here is my point in sharing.
1 Peter 4:8 – Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins.
When I am tempted to throw my husband's sins in his face or my sins in my own face, I need to remember to love him deeply. That love, through Christ, is enough to cover a multitude of sins, both his and my own.
#2) His grace is sufficient.
2 Corinthians 12:9 & 10 – But he said to me, “my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then am I strong.
Sometimes, my love for my husband isn't enough to to cover those sins completely. In those times, our Abba Father is waiting with open arms for me to run to him, rest in his arms, and allow Him to take control and let his power be perfected in my weaknesses.
#3) The enemy is like a “roaring lion”... seeking to kill, devour, and destroy.
1 Peter 5:8 & 9 – Be alert and sober minded. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.
Here is the GREAT part about this promise... I AM NOT ALONE!!! I have my sufferings, and they are so similar to those of other sisters in Christ! And while he may stalk us, within the perfected Power of Christ through my own weaknesses, Satan can NOT destroy me!
I am not perfect in loving my husband. There are so many times (even last night!) that I lose the battle with Satan over the fight for my marriage. But the war has already been won. On the Cross at Calvary, Christ said “it is FINISHED.” As a believer and a fellow heir to the Kingdom, Satan has no hold over my marriage.
In Psalms 103 it says from verses 8 through 10: “The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love. He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever; he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.” and then verse 12 “as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.” Since I have repented, then in my moments of weakness, I need to remember and claim: God does not accuse me any more. Anything else is a lie from Satan to tear me down and drive a wedge between myself and my husband.
In John 8:4 men aiming to trick Jesus brought him a woman and said: “Teacher, this woman was caught int the act of adultery... what do you say?” It is the later part of this answer that I claim... in verse 10 & 11: “Jesus straightened and up and asked her, 'Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?' 'No one, sir,' she said. 'Then neither do I condemn you,' Jesus declared. 'Go now and leave your life of sin.'
Christ has called us to leave our life of sin, and if we repent – it's done. I can choose to move on and look towards Christ to build and use my marriage for his glory. Perfect love casts out fear.
I will close with my favorite passage, which I aspire to one day fulfill within my marriage,
1 Peter 3
8-10a: Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. For, “Whoever would love life and see good days...
11-22: They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.” But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. For it is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive in the Spirit. After being made alive, he went and made proclamation to the imprisoned spirits— to those who were disobedient long ago when God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water, and this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also—not the removal of dirt from the body but the pledge of a clear conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ,who has gone into heaven and is at God’s right hand—with angels, authorities and powers in submission to him.
11-22: They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” Who is going to harm you if you are eager to do good? But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. “Do not fear their threats; do not be frightened.” But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander. For it is better, if it is God’s will, to suffer for doing good than for doing evil. For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive in the Spirit. After being made alive, he went and made proclamation to the imprisoned spirits— to those who were disobedient long ago when God waited patiently in the days of Noah while the ark was being built. In it only a few people, eight in all, were saved through water, and this water symbolizes baptism that now saves you also—not the removal of dirt from the body but the pledge of a clear conscience toward God. It saves you by the resurrection of Jesus Christ,who has gone into heaven and is at God’s right hand—with angels, authorities and powers in submission to him.
Sisters – We are not judged, but loved by women with our own pasts... we understand your hurts because we are going through the same journey. Much love and blessings on your marriage.
Also for women who are struggling with their pasts, I always recommend to women a book I have read called “Captivating” by John and Staci Eldridge. If you would like a copy but don't have the money for it right now, I will be more than happy to get one for you... Please message me with your information.
Love and Light.
I Kristus Alene – In Christ Alone
A Woman's Courage
Ladies, we can fight too!!
If your husband is a warrior that you are resolved to stand behind, feel free to re-post with pride! Let's be strong women of faith who CHOSE to defer Spiritual Leadership to our husbands, and reap the benefits of a wonderful God-fearing, wife-loving man in our lives!
Here's *our* version of "Courageous" by Casting Crowns!
He was made to be courageous, he was made to lead the way, his could be the generation that finally breaks the chains... he was made to be courageous. He was made to be courageous.
He's a warrior on the front lines, standing unafraid. Not a watcher on the side lines, while our family slips away. He is a man of courage, He is made of so much more... and the pounding of his heart cries, "I will serve the Lord."
He was made to be courageous, and he's taking back the fight. He was made to be courageous, and it starts with us tonight. The only way he'll ever stand, is on my knees with lifted hands. Make him courageous, Lord make him courageous.
This is my resolution, my answer to the call, I will build and love my husband, and refuse to let him fall. I will honor him with actions, I will follow him with pride, may the watchers become warriors, and with my man of God arise.
Seek justice, love mercy, walk humbly with your God;
Seek justice, love mercy, walk humbly with your God.
In the war of the mind I will make my stand, in the battle of the heart, in the battle of the hands.
In the war of the mind i will make my stand, in the battle of the heart, in the battle of the hands
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Miracle Celeste, my angel baby
A couple weeks ago, at the grocery store, I had etched into a "dog-tag" Miracle Celeste Serafino... the tag is now around my husband's neck, a reminder to him of our little baby. Our Valentine's day gift to God.
We were 6 weeks along with our precious child, so anxious for our pregnancy... so excited to meet our baby. After some spotting there was concern that perhaps the pregnancy might be ectopic. We were terrified, and Abraham took the time off from work to come with me to my ultrasound.
Our breath of relief at finding the gestational sac safely implanted in my uterus was short lived when the ultrasound technician told us that the baby was developed like it should be. She said this could be that we conceived later than we thought or that the baby took its time finding its way through my Fallopian tubes and to the place it implanted. We grabbed on to that little hope, but for me, I began to detach from the pregnancy. My heart knew something was wrong.
I was excited as I showed the ultrasound to my mother-in-law and siblings-in-law, but still something was off about the whole situation. My husband and I were taking an overnight trip to Lincoln, NE from our home in Omaha for our 1 year dating anniversary. So I tried to forget my discomfort.
In Lincoln, I went to the restroom and found I was bleeding. Not much, but bright red. I panicked. My husband and I drove to our motel while I sobbed and screamed and mourned the baby I knew I was losing. After calling my mother who has been an L&D RN for as long as I can remember until becoming an International Certified breastfeeding consultant, my midwife was notified, and she called me immediately to reassure me and tell me she'd call back with my hormone levels that night. When she called, she was hopeful... my hormones were rising... they'd gone from 1200 to 2100 in 48 hours... but all I heard from the call was "not quite doubled"...
My cramping and bleeding subsided for two days. On Valentine's Day, alone at home while my husband worked, it started up again. By the time we reached the ER, I didn't register a urine test and after passing a large clot of tissue (later determined it was *not* our baby), my hormones had dropped down to 100. I was almost complete in my miscarriage.
After a week, my hormones were down to a 3.5, and I was considered done.
My emotions have been all over the place. I grieve for this baby I lost. My arms ache. I miss her. I miss the kisses I would have showered her with. I miss her laughter that would fill my home with joy. I miss the baby tears I would have wiped away as I cradled my sweet baby, singing her to sleep.
But in this darkness I have found purpose. The PA who was in the ER was very "peppy"... the whole 3 hours we were there losing our child. She started by asking when i had been diagnosed "pregnant" which didn't bother me, but my husband wanted to know... was my condition a sickness to be diagnosed? Even though the hospital (a Catholic organization) has a policy of burial for ANY tissue (fetal, non-fetal, and organs from patients) removed, she told me our baby would be incinerated because "it wasn't at 12 weeks gestation." We had to ask that according to our religious beliefs, she be buried. And then we waited for the return call. We, of course, got it. our Miracle Celeste would be buried.
My mother, who as I stated is an RN, and coincidentally last year received Nurse of the Unit, and later Nurse of the Month for the ENTIRE hospital, knew the channels to file a complaint with. At our request, with our permission as well as details of our experience (she was not there), she did so... and it channeled through the Chief of Medical as well as the L&D department AND the ER department managers. We received a not-so-apologetic email from the PA (which the CoM saw, and my husband replied to the CoM to reiterate that my mother's letter was a true witness as requested by me, the patient) as well as apologies and sympathies from BOTH department managers... and a change in policy.
Now, an L&D nurse must be notified if there is a fetal loss in the ER. The ER staff is to be trained at orientation by an L&D nurse on fetal loss and how to help the parents with their grief. A BEAUTIFUL bereavement package (which I received the first prototype!) with a letter of sympathy as well as prayers, grief aid, a Certificate of Life, etc. MUST be given to parents experiencing loss, and included in the package is a 'bereavement card" which goes outside your door, with your files. ALL hospital staff is trained to recognize these cards and act accordingly when entering the room. Each parent experiencing a fetal loss is required to have a follow up call from the hospital's grief department.
What a blessing that in her short life, she achieved something that most grown pro-lifers haven't done in decades... she demanded and received a validation for her LIFE. And now, this hospital's ER will prove... she and others like her have had a LIFE worth grieving.
Love and Light.
Miracle Celeste, I never thought to write a note to you, until I wrote one to your baby brother. I'm sure you're hugging him and kissing him and romping around Heaven giving Nana and Great-Grandpa a hard time looking after you. I miss you, sweet baby. I miss you more than I can ever say. You were truly my heart's dearest Miracle. Daddy and I can't wait to meet you and shower you with kisses. I love you dearly! --Mommy
We were 6 weeks along with our precious child, so anxious for our pregnancy... so excited to meet our baby. After some spotting there was concern that perhaps the pregnancy might be ectopic. We were terrified, and Abraham took the time off from work to come with me to my ultrasound.
Our breath of relief at finding the gestational sac safely implanted in my uterus was short lived when the ultrasound technician told us that the baby was developed like it should be. She said this could be that we conceived later than we thought or that the baby took its time finding its way through my Fallopian tubes and to the place it implanted. We grabbed on to that little hope, but for me, I began to detach from the pregnancy. My heart knew something was wrong.
I was excited as I showed the ultrasound to my mother-in-law and siblings-in-law, but still something was off about the whole situation. My husband and I were taking an overnight trip to Lincoln, NE from our home in Omaha for our 1 year dating anniversary. So I tried to forget my discomfort.
In Lincoln, I went to the restroom and found I was bleeding. Not much, but bright red. I panicked. My husband and I drove to our motel while I sobbed and screamed and mourned the baby I knew I was losing. After calling my mother who has been an L&D RN for as long as I can remember until becoming an International Certified breastfeeding consultant, my midwife was notified, and she called me immediately to reassure me and tell me she'd call back with my hormone levels that night. When she called, she was hopeful... my hormones were rising... they'd gone from 1200 to 2100 in 48 hours... but all I heard from the call was "not quite doubled"...
My cramping and bleeding subsided for two days. On Valentine's Day, alone at home while my husband worked, it started up again. By the time we reached the ER, I didn't register a urine test and after passing a large clot of tissue (later determined it was *not* our baby), my hormones had dropped down to 100. I was almost complete in my miscarriage.
After a week, my hormones were down to a 3.5, and I was considered done.
My emotions have been all over the place. I grieve for this baby I lost. My arms ache. I miss her. I miss the kisses I would have showered her with. I miss her laughter that would fill my home with joy. I miss the baby tears I would have wiped away as I cradled my sweet baby, singing her to sleep.
But in this darkness I have found purpose. The PA who was in the ER was very "peppy"... the whole 3 hours we were there losing our child. She started by asking when i had been diagnosed "pregnant" which didn't bother me, but my husband wanted to know... was my condition a sickness to be diagnosed? Even though the hospital (a Catholic organization) has a policy of burial for ANY tissue (fetal, non-fetal, and organs from patients) removed, she told me our baby would be incinerated because "it wasn't at 12 weeks gestation." We had to ask that according to our religious beliefs, she be buried. And then we waited for the return call. We, of course, got it. our Miracle Celeste would be buried.
My mother, who as I stated is an RN, and coincidentally last year received Nurse of the Unit, and later Nurse of the Month for the ENTIRE hospital, knew the channels to file a complaint with. At our request, with our permission as well as details of our experience (she was not there), she did so... and it channeled through the Chief of Medical as well as the L&D department AND the ER department managers. We received a not-so-apologetic email from the PA (which the CoM saw, and my husband replied to the CoM to reiterate that my mother's letter was a true witness as requested by me, the patient) as well as apologies and sympathies from BOTH department managers... and a change in policy.
Now, an L&D nurse must be notified if there is a fetal loss in the ER. The ER staff is to be trained at orientation by an L&D nurse on fetal loss and how to help the parents with their grief. A BEAUTIFUL bereavement package (which I received the first prototype!) with a letter of sympathy as well as prayers, grief aid, a Certificate of Life, etc. MUST be given to parents experiencing loss, and included in the package is a 'bereavement card" which goes outside your door, with your files. ALL hospital staff is trained to recognize these cards and act accordingly when entering the room. Each parent experiencing a fetal loss is required to have a follow up call from the hospital's grief department.
What a blessing that in her short life, she achieved something that most grown pro-lifers haven't done in decades... she demanded and received a validation for her LIFE. And now, this hospital's ER will prove... she and others like her have had a LIFE worth grieving.
Love and Light.
Pro-Lifer Debate on Facebook
I just got into a Facebook argument with a woman I have never met. It was over this video posted by my friend, *******... a beautiful Christian woman, as well as an adoptive mother. She was using it, I believe to thank her "Superheros"... i.e her 3 children's biological mothers.
A friend of hers, who I will not name retorted to this video after I had commented:
Me: "Are these three the mothers who gave you your babies? If so I am thankful to them for you... *******, you are blessed by the gifts of your superheros. :D"
And one of ****'s sons' biological mommy: "That was a great video thanks *******; I love you all You guys are my heros thanks for never judging me and being willing to stand by my side on my worst days I could not be happier with the choice I made to have you guys be ****** mommy and daddy I'm so happy to have you apart of me I thank god for such an amazing family I love you all"
Here is her comment, and the debate that ensued.
Her: This video neglects to address the fact that these girls would have never had to make this decision had they had access to contraception and education about how to use it.
Me: Even contraception fail, and not all education is right... what makes them heros is that when the baby was HERE, and still a secret... they chose to go AGAINST mainstream "educations" and gave their babies LIFE and more importantly gave ***** and *******life as well, in the forms of three beautiful and happy and blessed children!
Another friend of *******'s added in reply to her comment:*****: I think today that the only ones who do not have easy access to free contraception are living 50 miles into the Appalachian mountains or 50 miles deep into the bayou. Anyway, life can take you by surprise. I got pregnant with my oldest daughter Samantha on a New Year's Eve, getting smashing drunk with my husband. Yes, I was married at the time, but nowhere near ready to have a child, especially at 20 and not having finished college.
Her: In many states girls under the age of 18 need parental consent and if many republicans would have there way health insurance would no longer pay for contraception. Also as part of the Bush era legacy abstinence–only education makes them confused and under educated. Yes they can get condoms but those fail or don't get used properly or at all. And with decreased funding to places like Planed Parenthood make it even more difficult for them. I am just saying if you are going to put so much pressure on these girls after they get pregnant, give them a fighting chance not to get that way in the first place.
Me: Abstinence IS the only free contraceptive that works 100% of the time. And planned parenthood, while it does do some good, supports murder and the COLD, CALCULATED murder of our most innocent, and defenseless, citizens... oh yes, here is a "conservative" point of view... and I didn't get here b/c of any brainwashed mumbo jumbo "confusion"...
I am a woman who after being taught abstinence before marriage by loving Christian parents, was sexually active teen and yet by the grace of God, I didn't concieve before meeting and marrying my husband.
Being sexually active scarred me in many ways... and I started my "activity" when I was 19. Even then, I know now, I was too young to make such a life altering decision as to have sex. CHILDREN under 18 have *no* business having sex, and we should *not* educate them to do so or that it's "okay" if they pop on a magic rubber film that will "keep them safe from pregnancy and STDs", when they are not 100% effective, anyways... but even my premarital trists aren't what makes me so passionately vocal for these girls, these heros, who went against the "pressure" also applied by people like you.
One month ago my husband and I miscarried our baby at 6 weeks. 6 weeks, and she had had a functioning heart before she died. Our little Miracle was a life that we mourn with all our hearts. An education from planned parenthood means *children* and *teens* who don't know any better get told that the *best* way is to MURDER their *own child*! Instead of being welcomed into the world by loving parents like *** and **** as well as the MOTHER who saw past her own selfish wants and saw that it wasn't *her body, her choice* because it was her baby's body that she would destroy, these babies are born to heaven...and trust me...as someone who lost a baby *naturally* and experience guilt at thinking somehow it *could* have been my fault... the guilt that would flood that baby's mother, who had taken her baby's life, would be unbearable.
Planned Parenthood, as well as the ER PA who "helped" us through our miscarriage would sooner call our baby a fetal tissue and incinerate it's remains, and that's that, everything's pretty again, we're no better off nor worse for losing our child. Nothing is worse then having someone who took an oath to protect you, to protect life turn into the person who encourages you to kill your child, or acts like the world is rainbows and lollipops when your baby dies... One less person contributing to global warming, right?
Once again, well done to these FANTASTIC mothers. Your selflessness at giving these babies life as well as to my dear friends, it blows me away.
Oh and I thank God for the dear friend who so lovingly encouraged me to stop having premarital sex and yet NEVER judged me but always loved me when I did mess up.... and THAT woman God has blessed abundantly...
THAT woman will surely "properly educate" her children so they "don't end up..." oh wait... did you hear what you said? And to whom? How cold!! Yes, ****'s children's biological mothers were in tight spots... but GOD used their situations for GOOD, and has blessed them with children when they were childless!
"Her children rise up and they bless her; her Husband also, and he praises her saying: 'many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all.'" Proverbs 31:28
*******, you are blessed.
Much love, Lydia...or better yet: Miracle's *mommy*
♥ Miracle Celeste, born to Heaven 02.14.12 ♥
Me: Oh and by the way, in response to you, *****, acknowledging that condoms do fail... I know and have heard of many women who got pregnant while properly taking the pill, and even IUDs don't always work...
Her: Your arguments are not based on fact. Do some research on planned parenthood and you will see that what they do most is prevent abortions. less than 3% of what they do is abortions. I am simply trying to give a voice to those who have none. The young girls who don't know what is going on with their bodies and don't have parents who respect them enough to tell them.
Her: This argument is not going to be won, just please except the fact that their are two valid points to this argument. No one wants an abortion and no one wants to give them. It is an horrible thing to go through. But so is giving a baby up. I am glad those women went through with their pregnancies and gave ******* three children that is a beautiful and selfless thing to do. I just wish there were more resources dedicated to preventing unwanted pregnancies all together. Yes it is better for girls to wait but unless you put a chastity belt on your daughter that is likely not going to happen. And using condemnation from God is not going to work either. As you have stated even you had premarital sex.
Me: Way to throw "even you had premarital sex" back to end your argument... I just clearly stated that if women like ******* or even myself now had been vocal about the scars I would receive, maybe I'd have paused to listen.
Or if society and media hadn't decided to "over-sex" the role models to little girls like Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus, etc... then those children wouldn't feel the need, or even think that it is okay, to make grown up choices. I do do research, sweetie.
My husband (and now I after losing our baby) are pro-life activists. It's funny... 3% huh? Now aren't condoms and contraceptives 97% effective? which means that when 97% of planned parenthood's "outreach" has failed, they make up for that with the 3%. Precious.
Me: Out of respect for the woman who is my hero in so many ways, I'm done with this argument. I've said my last word, feel free to say yours. I've been there, done that and because I went from a liberal non-partisan to a *gasp* conservative republican, I *know* both sides of the argument... it's a little harder to convince people like me that premarital sex is okay, that abortion is okay since I've been "converted" already... you're right... focus on the little kids who don't know any better and still have at least 15 years of wild, uninhibited, premarital sex without consequences ahead of them... now that's just a guess, considering the average age of a young person who gets married is 27, and currently children as young as 12 are having premarital sex.
Me: *******-- sorry for this ugly debate on something you meant to be a beautiful tribute to your babies and their biological mothers.
She just added [2 hours later]: I am sorry as well ******* I know you didn't put this up to offend anyone and know you think this video is a beautiful tribute to birth mothers, but it has a political agenda and I know you all know that. I understand your point but it can also offend and hurt people so just keep that in mind when you are telling other people how to live their lives.
Me: "Are these three the mothers who gave you your babies? If so I am thankful to them for you... *******, you are blessed by the gifts of your superheros. :D"
And one of ****'s sons' biological mommy: "That was a great video thanks *******; I love you all You guys are my heros thanks for never judging me and being willing to stand by my side on my worst days I could not be happier with the choice I made to have you guys be ****** mommy and daddy I'm so happy to have you apart of me I thank god for such an amazing family I love you all"
Here is her comment, and the debate that ensued.
Her: This video neglects to address the fact that these girls would have never had to make this decision had they had access to contraception and education about how to use it.
Me: Even contraception fail, and not all education is right... what makes them heros is that when the baby was HERE, and still a secret... they chose to go AGAINST mainstream "educations" and gave their babies LIFE and more importantly gave ***** and *******life as well, in the forms of three beautiful and happy and blessed children!
Another friend of *******'s added in reply to her comment:*****: I think today that the only ones who do not have easy access to free contraception are living 50 miles into the Appalachian mountains or 50 miles deep into the bayou. Anyway, life can take you by surprise. I got pregnant with my oldest daughter Samantha on a New Year's Eve, getting smashing drunk with my husband. Yes, I was married at the time, but nowhere near ready to have a child, especially at 20 and not having finished college.
Her: In many states girls under the age of 18 need parental consent and if many republicans would have there way health insurance would no longer pay for contraception. Also as part of the Bush era legacy abstinence–only education makes them confused and under educated. Yes they can get condoms but those fail or don't get used properly or at all. And with decreased funding to places like Planed Parenthood make it even more difficult for them. I am just saying if you are going to put so much pressure on these girls after they get pregnant, give them a fighting chance not to get that way in the first place.
Me: Abstinence IS the only free contraceptive that works 100% of the time. And planned parenthood, while it does do some good, supports murder and the COLD, CALCULATED murder of our most innocent, and defenseless, citizens... oh yes, here is a "conservative" point of view... and I didn't get here b/c of any brainwashed mumbo jumbo "confusion"...
I am a woman who after being taught abstinence before marriage by loving Christian parents, was sexually active teen and yet by the grace of God, I didn't concieve before meeting and marrying my husband.
Being sexually active scarred me in many ways... and I started my "activity" when I was 19. Even then, I know now, I was too young to make such a life altering decision as to have sex. CHILDREN under 18 have *no* business having sex, and we should *not* educate them to do so or that it's "okay" if they pop on a magic rubber film that will "keep them safe from pregnancy and STDs", when they are not 100% effective, anyways... but even my premarital trists aren't what makes me so passionately vocal for these girls, these heros, who went against the "pressure" also applied by people like you.
One month ago my husband and I miscarried our baby at 6 weeks. 6 weeks, and she had had a functioning heart before she died. Our little Miracle was a life that we mourn with all our hearts. An education from planned parenthood means *children* and *teens* who don't know any better get told that the *best* way is to MURDER their *own child*! Instead of being welcomed into the world by loving parents like *** and **** as well as the MOTHER who saw past her own selfish wants and saw that it wasn't *her body, her choice* because it was her baby's body that she would destroy, these babies are born to heaven...and trust me...as someone who lost a baby *naturally* and experience guilt at thinking somehow it *could* have been my fault... the guilt that would flood that baby's mother, who had taken her baby's life, would be unbearable.
Planned Parenthood, as well as the ER PA who "helped" us through our miscarriage would sooner call our baby a fetal tissue and incinerate it's remains, and that's that, everything's pretty again, we're no better off nor worse for losing our child. Nothing is worse then having someone who took an oath to protect you, to protect life turn into the person who encourages you to kill your child, or acts like the world is rainbows and lollipops when your baby dies... One less person contributing to global warming, right?
Once again, well done to these FANTASTIC mothers. Your selflessness at giving these babies life as well as to my dear friends, it blows me away.
Oh and I thank God for the dear friend who so lovingly encouraged me to stop having premarital sex and yet NEVER judged me but always loved me when I did mess up.... and THAT woman God has blessed abundantly...
THAT woman will surely "properly educate" her children so they "don't end up..." oh wait... did you hear what you said? And to whom? How cold!! Yes, ****'s children's biological mothers were in tight spots... but GOD used their situations for GOOD, and has blessed them with children when they were childless!
"Her children rise up and they bless her; her Husband also, and he praises her saying: 'many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all.'" Proverbs 31:28
*******, you are blessed.
Much love, Lydia...or better yet: Miracle's *mommy*
♥ Miracle Celeste, born to Heaven 02.14.12 ♥
Me: Oh and by the way, in response to you, *****, acknowledging that condoms do fail... I know and have heard of many women who got pregnant while properly taking the pill, and even IUDs don't always work...
Her: Your arguments are not based on fact. Do some research on planned parenthood and you will see that what they do most is prevent abortions. less than 3% of what they do is abortions. I am simply trying to give a voice to those who have none. The young girls who don't know what is going on with their bodies and don't have parents who respect them enough to tell them.
Her: This argument is not going to be won, just please except the fact that their are two valid points to this argument. No one wants an abortion and no one wants to give them. It is an horrible thing to go through. But so is giving a baby up. I am glad those women went through with their pregnancies and gave ******* three children that is a beautiful and selfless thing to do. I just wish there were more resources dedicated to preventing unwanted pregnancies all together. Yes it is better for girls to wait but unless you put a chastity belt on your daughter that is likely not going to happen. And using condemnation from God is not going to work either. As you have stated even you had premarital sex.
Me: Way to throw "even you had premarital sex" back to end your argument... I just clearly stated that if women like ******* or even myself now had been vocal about the scars I would receive, maybe I'd have paused to listen.
Or if society and media hadn't decided to "over-sex" the role models to little girls like Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus, etc... then those children wouldn't feel the need, or even think that it is okay, to make grown up choices. I do do research, sweetie.
My husband (and now I after losing our baby) are pro-life activists. It's funny... 3% huh? Now aren't condoms and contraceptives 97% effective? which means that when 97% of planned parenthood's "outreach" has failed, they make up for that with the 3%. Precious.
Me: Out of respect for the woman who is my hero in so many ways, I'm done with this argument. I've said my last word, feel free to say yours. I've been there, done that and because I went from a liberal non-partisan to a *gasp* conservative republican, I *know* both sides of the argument... it's a little harder to convince people like me that premarital sex is okay, that abortion is okay since I've been "converted" already... you're right... focus on the little kids who don't know any better and still have at least 15 years of wild, uninhibited, premarital sex without consequences ahead of them... now that's just a guess, considering the average age of a young person who gets married is 27, and currently children as young as 12 are having premarital sex.
Me: *******-- sorry for this ugly debate on something you meant to be a beautiful tribute to your babies and their biological mothers.
She just added [2 hours later]: I am sorry as well ******* I know you didn't put this up to offend anyone and know you think this video is a beautiful tribute to birth mothers, but it has a political agenda and I know you all know that. I understand your point but it can also offend and hurt people so just keep that in mind when you are telling other people how to live their lives.
~♥~
For my dear *******, I am hurt and troubled.
Thought I'd share this seeing as I now am considering myself a pro-life Activist...
Oh, and *****, even though you won't be reading my blog... My husband and I *do* protest Planned Parenthood... *with signs*!
Here's my hubby's opinion on this debate between she and I:
Him: young girls have voices and can ask not to be killed - unborn babies can't. it's not giving a voice to people that have none to demand abortions and stand up for planned parenthood. there are never two valid points to an argument where helpless innocents are being murdered. the only valid point is that it needs to stop. some doctors want to give abortions, for the money... and it's not true that no one wants to get one - this is a free country and no one (with a few exceptions) was ever forced to get an abortion - however many mothers are duped into getting them, without being "educated" about the emotional consequences, just like they're duped into having uninhibited sex without being warned about those emotional consequences... and it's true, most parents actually don't respect their children enough to warn them about the dangers of premarital sex, what pregnancy is and what it's like, and most parents aren't there to support their daughters if they do decide to carry their babies to term and either keep them or give them up for adoption, because they're too concerned about their own selfish pride. i'm willing to bet that most abortions are performed on the daughters of religious parents hoping to avoid a scandal - and the rest are on inconvenient children who might get in the way of a career or an education. no one i know uses "condemnation from god" to intimidate young women into leading lifestyles that are healthy for them and their babies... instead, they are encouraged to enjoy the benefits and the joyous advantages of motherhood [me: within a committed, married relationship]. anyone who has researched planned parenthood knows that it isn't there to help pregnant mothers, it's there to cull the population of what it sees as the weak and non-contributing members of society like catholics and people with black skin, in the hope of speeding up the process of evolution and creating a dominant, super-race of un-flawed human beings; thereby improving the quality of life for the "strong" and mercifully ending the futile existences of the weak."
also, "The Federation opposes restrictions on women's reproductive health services, including parental consent laws."
the article says that planned parenthood made $164 million by murdering around 300,000 babies. If you consider a [me: unborn] child a human life, abortion comes in as the second leading cause of death after heart disease and cancer. also the number of homoicides in 2009 in the USA was 16,799... in other words about 20 times as many children were aborted than adults and children classified as victims of "homicide".
Food for thought.
In memory of our little miracle, Miracle Celeste Serafino... at 5 weeks, she had a heart. At 6 weeks our heart was forever broken. With her brief life, our lives were forever changed.
**Image below is not our Miracle**
Love and Light.
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